Is it me, or does any movie Jason Statham does just seem like another Transporter sequel?

Crank is one of those movies that have action just for the sake of having action. The film’s excuse is an unrealistic, but somehow believable, plot that survives purely and literally on adrenaline. In the opening scene, we see Chev (Statham) waking up from what we can only assume is a night of extremely hard partying. He’s dizzy, woozy, and disoriented just as anyone would during any hangover. He soon realizes what we already know from the movie trailers that he has been poisoned and today will be the day that he dies. The longevity of his life depends solely on his operating level of adrenaline, so in order to seek revenge on his soon-to-be murderers, he must find ways to keep his adrenaline at peak levels. His doctor eventually tells him he needs one of three things to keep this going: sexual stimulation, physical activity, and fear. All three are coincidently key elements in any action movie.

Crank is one of those rare movies that truthfully never has a dull moment. When the film is in danger of having one, they manufacture an unexpected fight scene or a shootout to keep Chev’s adrenaline going. No guns around? Not a problem. Que the spontaneous sex scene or impromptu chase sequence. This film is so stuffed with meaningless action, they should have just titled it ‘Action Movie’. Think of it as Rambo and Die Hard wrapped up in a little ball and sprinkled with Crystal Meth-laced Red Bull. There were scenes where I had to pause it just to catch my breathe. I suggest renting it, pounding a can of your favorite energy drink, and strapping yourself into your seat.