When the promotional material, especially on YouTube shorts, refers to its own movie as “surreal”, it’s usually time to swallow hard and start looking for the door.  The word “surreal” in promotional material signifies that the movie in question is going to be one of two things:

1. In rare cases, a wild and freaky romp that leaves you badly disturbed

or

2. More usually, someone’s brain-damaged idea of a wild and freaky romp that leaves you badly confused.

Which is The Cellar Man?  Let’s find out!

This “surreal” short title features a really good reason not to go in the basement without a flashlight, guard dogs and a shotgun.

It’s actually kind of funny in a Mystery Science Theater sort of way.  I’m convinced that the main character actually said he was either late for his electrolysis or something about his trousers in a horrendous accent.  Also, when he’s trapped in the cellar, watch for him to try every possible way out except the doorknob.

But considering that the director of The Cellar Man’s first movie was a thrilling little opus called–get this!–”Four Retards In The Woods”, I don’t know what I was expecting.

And if you desperately need a bad movie fix after the video store is closed, then try The Cellar Man.  It’s garbage easily on par with even the great Ulli Lommel!

The Screenhead Ten Scale wipes away a tear of helpless laughter and awards this short a two out of ten for being hilarious in certain circumstances, but otherwise, crap.