The folks out at Dark Sky Films sent over a copy of Hatchet II for us to review, and I couldn’t be much more excited. I loved the first installment, billed as “Old School American Horror”–and billed quite correctly, too–but would the sequel follow in the original’s footsteps? That’s the question we ask and answer right here.

Hatchet II sends us back down to New Orleans, where murderous madman Victor Crowley (played once again by the best Jason Voorhees, Kane Hodder) is still running amok in the swamps. Heroine extraordinaire Marybeth is going back down to try and put paid to the monster once and for all, and finally avenge her fallen family, slain by no less than Crowley himself. But Marybeth discovers that the Crowley clan is actually closer to her than she thinks. So now, Marybeth returns, as I mentioned, but with a whole lot of extra firepower…a team of mercenaries ready to show Victor just what kind of stones Marybeth has. But will even all this extra firepower manage to tip the scales in Marybeth’s favor?

While Hatchet II will be over the top, writer / director Adam Green could use a lesson in anatomy, because if that first kill got strangled by what I think he got strangled by, he had about nine-tenths of a mile to go before he ran out of room. A bit of a spoiler, but only if you use logic. Special bonus for those of you paying careful attention, there will be at least two other references to other Green work (Frozen and the Jack Chop YouTube video, specifically), and that’s always a plus. They’re quick, so you’ll have to look carefully, but these little in-jokes make things even better.

It’s about as good as I expected, with a little more humor and a little more gore to take the place of the more straightforward slasher of the first. It could have gone stale easily, but this time, Green cuts off that possibility by simply going the zany route and putting in in-jokes and ludicrous gore to keep things interesting.

The last fifteen minutes are a series of logical impossibilities followed by gore so preposterous that you’ll be dumbfounded throughout. I don’t know when the last time I managed to scream at a movie “He’s got a belt sander!” was, but this was one of those times. And don’t even get me started on the curb stomping.

The question you’ll have to ask yourself is, can you stomach fountains of high-pressure fake gore going off all around you as random people are killed in progressively more bizarre ways up until an abrupt yet surprisingly satisfying ending? If the answer is yes, then you will love Hatchet 2. If the answer is no, you’re already arranging to host a party in which you burn several thousand copies.

Meanwhile, the Screenhead Ten Scale gives Hatchet II, this in-joke filled romp of ultra-mayhem, a seven out of ten for being over the top, and often ludicrous, and frequently, not scary, which was supposed to be the point of a horror flick anyway, last I knew.